Whatever with Heather - Mindset, Parenting & Personal Growth
From mindset, to parenting, to life's ups and downs... nothing is off the table. This podcast is here to encompass the many sides of us all.
Whatever with Heather - Mindset, Parenting & Personal Growth
3. [How to Do A] Mid-Year Review & Reset
Are you checking in with yourself regularly? Stalling on a goal or maybe even avoiding something? Fear not, in this episode we dive into mid-year reviews and resets. We're going to get real about our lives, assessing what's working and what's not. We'll talk about reclaiming our time AND our energy.
But, hold on, we're not stopping there. This episode also hones in on the art of setting priorities and making room for what truly matters. We'll talk about the questions to ask yourself to guide you through the process of assessing your life and identifying those areas where you genuinely wish to commit your energy. Finally, as if that wasn't enough, we're going to zero in on that one primary goal to ensure success. So, jump in and make the most of your precious time and energy.
Hey, welcome to Whatever with Heather. Today we are going to do and talk about a mid-year review and reset. Now we're all familiar with New Year's resolutions and setting goals at the beginning of the year, but that only happens once a year and, quite frankly, that's not frequently enough for how much our lives change and evolve and also holding ourselves accountable to those goals that we set, maybe at the beginning of the year, or even the goal we set at the beginning of the week. We need much more frequent review and resetting and recalibrating of our goals and our mindsets and where we're headed in life, and so this episode is here to support you in doing kind of an evaluation of where you're at and where you'd like to go. This episode is going to be really actionable. I'm going to give you the exact questions you can ask yourself to review your year or review your month or review your quarter, however often you'd like to do this, and then to reset and recalibrate, figuring out where you would like to go next. Kind of think of your life as a road trip. There's not just like you're not just going on one destination, like if you have a 24-hour road trip, you're going to have little points along the way, and so when we reset and we recalibrate and we review where we're at and where we're going, then we can make sure that we're hitting these points along the way in our life that are important to us. We may find that there are places we want to go that we hadn't thought about, and if you're currently maybe feeling stuck in your life and you're feeling some resistance and you're not sure where to go next, this will be perfect for you as well. So let's dig right on in.
Speaker 0:Okay, so the first thing we're going to do is review Review what's going on in our life. First, we're going to look at what is going well and we're also going to look at what is not going well. So, kind of, look at your life right now and think about the areas or the habits or the mindsets you have that are going well. There are lots of areas of our life we can review. So if you'd like to just pick three to look at for right now, or five or 10, or maybe you want to do like a whole life review, there's no rule on this, but what feels good to you right now, maybe it's to simplify and just look at three areas. Some examples of some areas in your life could be your health, your wellness, your relationships. Relationships could be to your significant other, children, friendships, extended family. You could look at your career and your contribution to the world. You could look at your home. You could look at your external commitment, so your commitments outside the home. You could look at spirituality, mental health, emotional health, physical health. All of these areas are areas that we can look at. What is going well in each of these areas. You could also look at financially where that's going. Maybe you have a goal of having a garden this year. What is going well in your garden? So we can really like zoom in or zoom out, whatever you would like.
Speaker 0:So pick three to 10 areas of your life that you kind of want to look at, and the first thing is what's going well in each of these areas. So you can pause this or just write down this question and come back to it later, and then the next thing you're going to do is what's not going well or what am I avoiding in these areas? We first look at what's going well, because if there's a, you know, a couple things going well in each area, it's good to acknowledge where we're showing up where we're doing what feels aligned, where we're doing what we would like to be doing in those areas. A lot of times we motivate ourselves with shame, blame and guilt of what we're not doing right and those just aren't high vibe, high motivating emotions, and so we motivate ourselves first for what's going right and then what's not going right, and in some areas you may have nothing really going right because it's not been a focus. But if you now want it to be a focus, we look at what's not going right from a place of non-judgment, just from a place of information. So we have our areas laid out and what is going well and what is not going well, and when looking at this we can kind of see where there might be some holes in the areas of our life that we would like to focus on. So if you are saying you want to focus on your relationship to your children and there's not much going well in that area, then that becomes pretty clear that that's an area of focus that maybe we should zoom in on for the next little bit and since we can do as many reviews and resets and recalibrations as we'd like, we could set a container or a timeframe around this. So I would like to focus on my relationship with my children for the next two weeks, which might not seem like a lot, but if it's a smaller timeframe it's easier for us to focus and then at the end of those two weeks, we can review and see what's going well and what's not. Or maybe this is a weekly thing that you're doing, but pick some areas of your life that you'd like to work on three to 10 of them. I actually prefer three, because the greatest change can happen when we're focusing on less things. But you do you and do what feels good. Or maybe just create a review here of multiple areas and then pick some to focus on moving forward with what we're going to talk about in the rest of this podcast.
Speaker 0:The other thing we need to look at in our lives in our lives, we have kind of two main categories that we all have, and one thing we all have that is the same as time. We all have the same 24 hours in the day. Now the areas of our life are going to drain time, but we need to look at first where's our time going. So if all my time is going to things that are not my priority, then maybe some things need moved around Now. Obviously, we have a job that's going to take up a certain amount of time, but maybe there's some other priorities in your life that you're wanting to use your time for. This is where we start to get real clear on where we have what I like to call time leaks, where somewhere our time is just leaking away, it's flowing away, it's disappearing into the abyss and we don't know where it's going. And so we do a little bit of a time audit on ourselves of where's my time going. Like I say, I want to fit this in or spend more time being intentional with this, but I don't have the time. But I know I kind of probably have it. Even 15 minutes can lead to a lot of change, and so where do I have time leaks?
Speaker 0:The next thing we're going to look at, which is, I think, overlooked oftentimes, is when is my energy going? Where do I have energy leaks? For example, if you are someone who has a lot of negative self-talk, then a lot of your energy is going to this voice in your head that is being critical, which then makes you have to deal with living this critical, self-critical life. That is an energy leak. If I am wasting my time scrolling my phone, which is something I'm totally guilty of, and I'm engaging with people online in my neighborhood Facebook group, then I am letting my energy leak into those areas. I have now spent energy on things I actually do not care about, because I do not care, but for some reason I want to be in there. Maybe you can relate. We're looking at where our time is going and where our time is leaking. We're looking at where our energy is going and where we have energy leaks.
Speaker 0:Another example of an energy leak could be your children have specific chores and they know what they are, but they always seem to forget, so you're having to use your energy to constantly remind and nag. That's probably relatable to some of you. Yeah, it's relatable to me. When we look at our energy leaks, the way that some of these can be solved, especially for the chores, or we always forget what to pack when we go here or there, or we're always forgetting appointments to last minute, then that means there are systems in my life that I'm missing, whether that is an alarm, whether that's a calendar on the wall, whether that's my children have a chore list that they are responsible for checking off, and it's not my job to remind them. They need to learn to remind themselves whether it is habits that are stealing energy from us habits such as scrolling our phones, habits such as negative self-talk or whether it is mindsets that are creating energy leaks. Like I have to do it all, I have to constantly hustle, I have to be involved in all the things, or this is how I show people I care is by giving them all my time. So we have mindsets that also create energy leaks in our life. So when we feel like we have no time, oftentimes, yes, we are busy, and it is also true that we are not being intentional with our time and then the other side of that same coin is energy.
Speaker 0:We all have energy, and our energy can fluctuate day to day, and so, with whatever amount of energy I have when I wake up that day, am I using it in ways that actually matter to me, or am I letting it leak out into things I do not care about? So, if we're looking at what is going well, give yourself gold stars. What is not going well, with no judgment. Where am I spending my time and where would I like to spend my time and where is my energy going and where would I like my energy to go? Even just these four questions give you a really clear blueprint to go forward. This is where I'd like to spend my energy. This is where I do not want to spend my energy. That already gives you some quick changes you can make in your life. My energy would like to go to this, which means I need to release this, which means I need to focus on this because it is important to me. Or my time is all going here, or my time is disappearing into the abyss and I need to be more intentional with my time, and then that becomes your blueprint, your game plan. Moving forward is more intentional with your time, paying attention to when your time is just leaking into the abyss or when your energy is going places you don't want it to go. Even just being mindful for a whole week can set you up to reset where you're at in life and get you where you would like to go. Okay, so we have those questions and we've talked about where you can apply them to your life. Start to figure out what you would like to focus on, where you'd like your time and your energy to go.
Speaker 0:Now I'm going to give you a few more questions that may help support you moving forward in this. Like, well, okay, I know this is where I want my energy to go, or I don't like how I'm spending my time. A lot of times, we know what we don't like about our lives. We don't know what we want. This is why we ask the question where do I want my energy to go? Where would I like my time to go? What is going well so I can keep doing that, and what's not going well so that I can create solutions to that?
Speaker 0:The next questions are what I like to call add in, let go, and I want you to pick things habits, vibes, experiences, beliefs, practices or people that you would like to add in that go towards where you'd like your energy to go, in those areas of your life where you'd like to spend your time. Now, we're not adding in all of these things. We're not adding in things and people and vibes and experiences and beliefs and practices. We're not adding in all. One of each. Pick three things to add in. Now, when we add in stuff, like we are a finite amount of a person and have a finite amount of ability to carry things. This is why we get overwhelmed is because we have overflowed. So as we add things in, that means we need to create space. So we add things in and at the same time, we let things go.
Speaker 0:And things we can let go are things, people, vibes, commitments, beliefs and practices that are no longer serving us. You can stick to three let goes and three add-ins. Or maybe you decide to let go of a whole heck of a lot and that's okay. Think of it as a spring cleaning, like this commitment is no longer serving me. It is an energy leak. It's not even something I really care about. It's something I feel like I should care about, but I don't. So let someone else that truly cares about that take that on. Let that be their commitment and free yourself from that so that you have time and space to contribute to the world in a way that actually fills you up, or contribute to your family in a way that fills you up, or contribute to yourself in a way that fills you up.
Speaker 0:So what do we need to let go? Oftentimes, these are beliefs and mindsets that play in our head. Might be the self-critical voice and that might be all you let go of for a week, noticing where this voice is draining your energy and your time and your ability to move towards the life you want. Just notice it and say like I hear you but I don't. It makes me think of the song from Frozen 2. I can hear you but I won't. So I hear what this mean negative voice, but I'm not going like we're not going there. This is not a discussion I'm having because I want to build a kind inner voice and so if I'm letting go of the mean voice, then what do I need to add in A kind inner voice?
Speaker 0:So for some of our add-ins and let-goes, they will work together. I will release this and I will add in this it may be friendships. So there may be friendships or relationships you need to release. Well, that can feel really lonely if you're just releasing friendships. So maybe it's time to add in and you join a workout group or you join like women in your neighborhood for coffee, or you create something where new people will be, so that you can fill that need that you may have for this social connection with people. But there may be people you need to release once again from a place of non-judgment. These people are not bad and, at the same time, you are allowed to move into different spaces. You do not have to stay the same and you do not always have to be with the same people. So we add in and we let go. We must do both to create space and to make sure that we are not reaching overwhelm. We must empty out some stuff before we can pour more in. Okay, and I have one more thing. If you're wanting one more thing Now, you may just be like I just want to focus on where I'm spending my time and energy Perfect.
Speaker 0:You may be like I just want to focus on adding and let go Perfect. Or you may want to focus on this next thing, which is goals I've been ignoring that are truly important to me. Make a list. This is how we're going to figure out what goals you're ignoring that's truly important to you, and actually everyone should do this and I know this is like the one add on, like cherry on top, but this might feel good. So I want you to think of like you have goals for yourself and we're going to make a list, and I want you to think of the number one goal that you know you need to go for, or the number one change that you need to make in your life. So this could be a goal or a change, just the number one. Think of that, All right, and then we're going to make a list of the rest and, just kidding, we're actually not going to make a list of the rest. The only thing you're going to focus on is that number one goal. That's it. One goal or one change that you said was your number one most important. So the other goals right now can take a backseat and focus on that one and then see how, when you're doing that, what type of energy that generates in your life. Right, an object of motion stays in motion, and so, as you're building and you're moving towards this goal that you know is your most important, that's going to create a certain feeling in your life versus and maybe you are like me A lot of times I reach for some of my like less important goals because the one goal is kind of big or feels like maybe I want it but I don't want it.
Speaker 0:Whatever the reason is, I like do these other little goals that are not as important to me. They become the priority and the number one goal gets ignored, year after year, after year after year, and so it's time to focus on whatever that number one goal was. Does this feel good? Does this feel overwhelming? So, if this is feeling good, perfect, focus on. Give yourself a week, a week.
Speaker 0:Now, if this is feeling overwhelming, what I would like you to do is just focus on where my time and energy are going. Nothing else, no add-ins, no let goes. Where is your time going and is it going where you would like it to go? And where is your energy going and is it going where you'd like it to go? And then, what adjustments do you need to make to get your time and energy going to the places you truly value? And if you're wondering what you truly value, you can go back and listen to the podcast.
Speaker 0:It's episode one, the next version of you, that one. We talk about what you truly value, and so in this one, we're a little more actionable. What am I doing with my time and energy? And on that note, I will be running a mid-year review and reset program. So send me a DM to my Instagram at HeatherEvanslife with the word reset and I'll make sure to send you some more information when that is available. This will be a review and reset program that will start in August. So is it exactly the middle of the year? No, but for many people this is the beginning of a school year. Since we were young, august kind of was the start of something new. So we're just going to let that play out in our lives now and we'll do a mid-year review and reset where we actually walk through all of this for six weeks and work together on slowly building, adding in, letting go, working on our time and energy and focusing on that number one goal that we have. I will see y'all next time on the podcast. See you again soon. Bye-bye.