Whatever with Heather - Mindset, Parenting & Personal Growth
From mindset, to parenting, to life's ups and downs... nothing is off the table. This podcast is here to encompass the many sides of us all.
Whatever with Heather - Mindset, Parenting & Personal Growth
24. Process for Doing a Yearly Review
As your go-to gal for all things growth and reflection, I'm kicking off 2024 with a personal journey into the art of setting attainable goals and the power of disciplined living. I've taken the plunge with the Modern Wisdom Annual Review, and trust me, it's been a game-changer in assessing my past year's milestones across all facets of life. This isn't just about goal-setting; it's a deeper dive into living with intention and authenticity, and I'm here to guide you every step of the way.
As we wrap ourselves in the coziness of winter, let's use this introspective season to craft a future that resonates with our aspirations. I'm inviting you to join me in not just setting goals but living them.
Hey y'all, welcome back to another episode of Whatever with Heather and the first episode of 2024. Thank you for being here. If it's your first time on the podcast, welcome, and if you're a repeat listener, welcome back and welcome to a new year. It took a couple weeks off on the podcast over Christmas break, over the holiday break, so that I could be present with my family, and we really enjoyed that time together, and now it's time to just dive right on into 2024. As I was setting some goals, resolutions, whatever you want to call them, or setting the vibe for the new year, I had a few people reach out to me on Instagram and ask what I was doing to figure out what goals to set for the new year, and so I figured making a podcast episode about that would really be the best way to share what I did and what my goals are going forward.
Speaker 1:Now I would like to say that every year I have the exact same method, but I don't. I actually like to try different things different years, and this year I tried a new annual review method, and if you want to find this method, you can Google Modern Wisdom Annual Review. Modern Wisdom is another podcast. It's one I listened to here and there, and he talks about his annual review process, so I decided to print it out, give it a go, and I really loved this process. I'll share briefly what I did and then what goals I settled on for the new year. I have my handy dandy clipboard and all of the notes that I use to fill in what I would be doing for this upcoming year. The first part of the annual review for here talks about your best memories and it lists a bunch of favorite this favorite, that best, this best that and I realized in doing this that I don't keep very good track of what has happened to me throughout the year. I was also listening to a different podcast a few weeks ago and they were talking about how they had felt throughout different months of the year, and for me it's really hard to go back through the year past and remember how I was feeling and what I was struggling with and what I was doing well, and that triggered for me this year to create a daily journal of sorts where I can put these things down on paper. I can remember what my day to day felt like, what my energy was, what my mood was, things that I was proud of things that I wasn't so proud of, and I've started doing this in a notebook and at the bottom of this page of favorite memories, I kind of outlined what I would like to be in that daily review for myself or daily notes for myself. But after I feel like I've honed this in for a couple weeks, I'm going to put this in a digital form so that I can share it with y'all and if you want to keep track of what you're doing throughout the day, the way you're feeling, your personal health, your movement being outdoors. It will have a lot of things, but not everything, just the things that I feel like are truly the difference makers for the day to day. I also don't want it to feel excessive and like a lot of work and at the same time I don't want to spend another year where I am completely clueless for how I spent my days and my time. So this daily journal, daily review for myself, is a way for me to make sure and hold myself accountable to being intentional with each day. So that's the first thing that kind of came from this annual review and I will let you know when those journal outlines are ready to share with you.
Speaker 1:The first part of the annual review is actually reviewing going over the last year, 2023. And in this review process you go over four main areas of your life Career, relationships, health and personal development. So for each of these four areas, you are given questions to answer. The questions are, for example, if I'm looking at career, what went well this year? Why, what did I learn? Same thing for relationships what went well this year, why and what did I learn? Same questions for health and personal growth. That is the first section of your review for the year. The next questions you're asked are what habit or system accounted for most of my success and why? And are there opportunities to double down? So, to get super focused, do more of that. And the next question is what are the most valuable ways I am spending my time and how can I allocate more time to these areas? The next question is what brought me the most happiness and how can I ensure these activities happen more often? And who are the people who had the greatest impact on me and how can I see and collaborate with them more.
Speaker 1:So this is just a quick overview of your year and the four areas of focus, and I'll just share one area for me In personal growth. What did I learn? I learned that my time is valuable and finite. I learned on repeat that I love to teach and empower others teens and adults. So, as I substituted, taught this year, I really found that I enjoy creating space for people to feel like they can breathe, that they are enough, that they can enjoy life, even if just for a small time. And the last thing I learned in that area for personal growth is that the expectations of others should not override my expectations of myself. Now, of course, I did this for all four areas, but just wanted to share that one area, and that is why doing a review is so important, because we often don't realize what we've learned or how we've grown until we're forced to take time, or we make ourselves take time to slow down and think back To the question what habit or system accounted for most of my success and why I wrote saying no to anything that wasn't a hell yes.
Speaker 1:I got very good at saying no this year For me. Are there any opportunities to double down? I wrote to keep doing this the saying no to anything that's not a hell yes. Keep doing that and become more focused with how I spend my me time or my free time. And then also in this review, things that kept coming up is that I just need to be more disciplined. I just need to do it. Sometimes I'm not gonna be in the right vibe, but sometimes you just gotta do the thing. Do the thing that you say you're gonna do, keep your promises to yourself and schedule my time, because I can get really flitty like hummingbird with my time, like go do this thing, go do that thing, da da da, which is fine, as long as I'm making sure that I'm not just flitting from thing to thing that doesn't actually matter to me.
Speaker 1:And so, for me, making sure that I have scheduled or written down daily goals really tangible things keeps me a little more grounded. I'm not flitting around to things that I actually don't care about. I'm making sure that the things I'm moving around to throughout my day are things that actually matter to me, things that bring me joy, things that move the needle forward in my life, things that I know help my mental and physical and emotional health, things that help my spiritual health. I like doing a lot of things that contribute to that, but if I'm not scheduling them and I'm not being focused. I will just da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da and be all over the place doing things that I don't even care about and then at the end of the day being like, well, that day kind of was meh. So if I get scheduled and focused, I can still use that moving around energy, because I do like to task switch, I do like to change what I'm doing throughout the day. It keeps my motivation up, it keeps my energy up and so integrating how I kind of naturally am, and then bringing some structure and boundaries to that so that it becomes more potent and more powerful and more intentional.
Speaker 1:Then the next part of the annual review is looking at those four areas career relationships, health and personal growth and looking at the lessons from the past year. So for each area, you're asked these questions what didn't go so well this year and why, and what did I learn? And we do that for all four areas what didn't go well, why and what did I learn? For me, what came up was what didn't go so well was that I was not as focused and consistent as I could have been, why I just let myself slide. And what did I learn? That I need to have preparation and a checklist that I don't have to think of day to day. I've really learned that if I know what I'm doing, I'll pretty much do it Like this podcast. I know it's gonna come out every week, I get it done. But if I'm having to think every day what do I need to do, then it doesn't really happen. But if I prepare and have a checklist and I know what's going to happen for the next day or even for the week ahead, I'm very good at getting those tasks done. So for me, preparation is key and really tangible checklist tasks. I love checking things off a list. I know you probably do too, and so a checklist for me is just like giving myself gold stars throughout the day. I love it. So that was just one area.
Speaker 1:The next part of this review for the past year asks some more questions. These questions are what did I expect to complete but didn't? Is this still an important goal of mine, and how can I make future follow through more likely? This is where you really kind of call yourself out on maybe these long-term reoccurring goals that continue to just get past year to year to year to year. Or you set this goal at the beginning of the year and you didn't nail it, and that's okay. But in order to do something different this next year, we have to acknowledge something you wanted to complete but didn't. For me, it was my book. And is it still an important goal of mine? Heck, yes. And how can I make future follow through more likely? It's got to go on my daily checklist, for sure.
Speaker 1:The next questions were what is the least valuable way I'm spending my time? Anything I should have said no to, and why, and how can I prevent myself continuing to spend my time in this way? For me and if you follow me on social media, you know this the least valuable way I'm spending my time is my phone. And how can I prevent myself from continuing to spend my time this way? Very strict phone rules for myself. My phone usage and time needs to be strictly defined. It needs to be part of my checklist. It needs to have very strong boundaries around it in which I have to hold myself accountable to it daily.
Speaker 1:Now, some people might feel like this is excessive, but for me, even back in 2018, I had strong goals around using my phone less, and I did well for a while and this still continues to be a recurring theme in my life, year after year after year, and if I don't get a handle on it, then it's going to continue to be a theme For me. To expect that it all of a sudden won't be a theme without me putting in actual work is kind of silly at this point, because if this was a problem back in 2018 and it continues to be a problem in 2024, then I haven't learned anything. I haven't changed anything, and if you're not changing the things you want to change, then who is actually in control of your life? And for me, I Definitely have a phone addiction. Phones are meant to be addicting. Social media is meant to be addicting. So I don't come from a place of shame on you, blame yourself, your trash. You can't fix this.
Speaker 1:I come from a place of ownership. I Do not want to get to the end of another year and feel like my phone Ruled my priorities rather than my priorities ruling my life. I want to rule my life, not my brain that is addicted to my phone. And when I allow my phone to hijack my brain, who is in control? The app creators, the Advertising people, whoever, it is right. I am no longer in control of my life. Now, scrolling my phone may feel like freedom, like, oh, I have the freedom to scroll if I want to, but for me it is not. I know this, I know it for sure for me and I'm not speaking for anyone else because I don't live your story I know for some people a phone is a great way to just Take a breath for the day or take a breath throughout parts of your day, but for me, my phone is how I check out of life.
Speaker 1:For me, taking a breath is journaling or taking a nap, or meditating or Doing watercolor. All of those things are what give me that breath. My phone is me escaping. So for me I know it's something I need to change. So it has become a high priority for 2024, because if I get to the end of this year and haven't fixed it, haven't worked on it, haven't disciplined myself, then who is running the show? It is not me, and I want to run the show of my life. Well, that was a little phone tangent, but that's how strongly I feel about it.
Speaker 1:For me, the next questions in this are have my goals or priorities shifted in the last three months, and is there anything I'm doing that's no longer in alignment? Those are really good questions to ask. The next questions are knowing what I know now, what advice would I give myself, and what habits or systems would improve my follow-through, and how can I make my environment more Supportive of my goals? I'll share my answers to these. Knowing what you know now, or knowing what I know now, what advice would I give myself? The advice is you can do a lot in a small amount of time. Your freedom is on the other side of your discipline. What habits or systems would improve my follow-through?
Speaker 1:Daily checklist, time-blocking Literally creating a frame around my day where I still have flexibility within those frames but there is a boundary around my time and Lists of what to get done so that I'm not using that brainpower every day. And how can I make my environment more supportive of my goals? Phone out of the bedroom, buy an alarm clock those two things have already been done and make sure my checklists are on autopilot. So I'm trying out this new app where I can create my checklists and they just show me what needs done for the day. I'm gonna be using that and I'll share that with you. It's called tick tick and I'll share that with you, maybe after I've used it for a while. If you don't ever hear about it again, it's cuz I stopped using it, but that's what I'm trying so that I can get my lists automated. So, every Monday, I know I do this, every Tuesday, I know I do this and you can set up tick tick to do that for you. And then also, when it comes to health and fitness, my workout clothes, morning food and drink ready to go, also Planning my workouts for the week, but I use an online app for my workouts, so mostly it's me just making sure I get up and do it. And finally, for the review for 2023, you do a recap.
Speaker 1:What were my biggest wins and what did I learn from each? For me, one of my biggest wins was this weekly podcast. I was very consistent and what did I learn is that I can do the damn thing if I just do it. If I just do it, I'll get it done. Another big win was saying no to draining expectations, and what did I learn? That the nose fade away. What I mean is the constant expectations of others start to go away, and I don't feel like I have to say no as much because I've said no to so many things and so less things come my way. Better knows.
Speaker 1:The next question is where were my time, attention and energy best spent and how can I double down in these areas? My list was writing, movement, video content, family and programs and courses. How do I double down discipline and use checklists? And the last question is where could my time, attention and energy have been allocated more effectively and how can I make this reality? I just wrote in all the areas above. That's where I want to focus more and how can I make it a reality by not scrolling my phone. That opens up so much more time and energy for me to do the things that really make me proud, that give me a sense of accomplishment, that fill my bucket, that contribute to the world that old lady will be proud of. Those are the things that I want to spend my time on now, so that future me will look back and be proud of how I spent my time.
Speaker 1:Okay, time for a little water break right here in the middle. I'm sure it's not the middle of the podcast, but it's the middle where we're switching from reviewing to planning. Okay, so we're looking at these four areas career, relationships, health and personal growth and this is what this review has labeled your North Star. So what when you're looking for direction in your life for what to do? What are your North Star goals? So, looking at career, what is my most important goal for next year? It is 100% my book.
Speaker 1:I wrote multiple goals here, like three goals, but number one is publish my book. The next question is why is this goal important to me and what will success look like? How will I know I have succeeded? The next question you ask yourself about the goal is on an average day, someone who will achieve this goal does XYZ. So my most important goal is publishing my book. Why is it important to me? Multiple reasons, and what will success look like? That the book will be published. And, on an average day, someone who will achieve this goal. What do they do? They write daily. They do it even if they don't feel like writing. They write.
Speaker 1:Then it gives a list of milestones how will I know if I'm on track to achieving this goal and then quarter one, quarter two, quarter, three milestones, and then it has a section for action steps. What are the actions I need to take in order to accomplish this goal and what can I do now to increase my chances of success? I like this because this pretty much narrows down your life into four main goals, one in each of these categories, and an action plan. And after writing out these four things, I realize my main goals are not so out of reach. So my main goal when it comes to career is getting my book published, and I have action steps to make sure I get that done.
Speaker 1:The next is relationships. What's my most important goal for next year with relationships? For me, it's being present with my family, with intentional time and experiences. I have a backup goal of finding a community or creating a community of focused women, women that are devoted to their personal growth, but that is a secondary goal to my North Star goal and my goal is to not be spread so thin that I don't accomplish my main four goals, the one in each area. Then answer the question why is achieving this goal important to me and what does success look like? And, on an average day, someone who will achieve this goal and for me I wrote we'll be present and we'll schedule intentional time with their family and then action steps. And what can I do now to increase my chance of success. So I have there that I need to schedule time, plan activities For more intentional time with my family. I also need to be intentional about our chore system so that it opens up more time for all. Of us have a weekly family meeting. We used to do this on Sundays and I loved it. It's a little bit goal oriented but also family connection oriented, and we will be reinstating that this year. Another relationship goal for me is to cook more with Brian. So Brian does most of our cooking and I actually love when we cook together and I'd like to gain some cooking skills. So learning from him, helping him with the cooking, but also deepening our relationship and learning his skill at the same time.
Speaker 1:The next plan for health what is my North Star goal? For me it's consistent movement and stacking my habits. If you've ever heard of habit stacking, it's where you take one of your habits, like brushing your teeth, and you stack another habit next to it, so it might be taking your vitamins or using your water pick, and you're slowly like adding habits before or after habits you already do, which helps you stack habits. I have been pretty successful at this this past year of stacking habits and I just want to continue to do that so that I am more consistent in the things that I really need to do for my health. And then for me, it's consistent movement.
Speaker 1:Brian and I have really pulled back on this really intense workout mindset. It was probably two years ago that we really pulled back on just pushing so hard. We really care about the longevity of our bodies, the longevity of our joints and our muscles and our bones and our ligaments, and that informs how we work out. So for both of us, as long as we are consistently moving, we're doing some weightlifting and some yoga and getting steps in and dancing and playing basketball as a family or going and playing tennis as long as we're consistently moving, we feel good physically, our bodies are strong, we're able to move well, we have good range of motion, we're not getting injuries and that is the goal. So, consistent movement.
Speaker 1:Why is achieving this goal important to me? Longevity and prolonged health. What will success look like? And on an average day, someone who will achieve this goal I wrote that someone will achieve this goal will prepare, they'll schedule, they'll eliminate excuses and they'll make it easy. One thing about habit stacking is it's all about making it easy. So my vitamins are next to my toothpaste or next to my bed or wherever it needs to be, so that it just happens I don't have to think. That's where you can use your brain as a really strong tool, because it likes the path of least resistance. So working with it can create some magic of not having to force yourself to do things. They just slowly start happening on autopilot I should say on autopilot-ish right, you're still doing them, but you are using your brain and yourself to just make it happen a lot more easily than it would had you not set yourself up for success.
Speaker 1:Then milestones for quarter one, two and three. I didn't really write anything here because it's just kind of this daily simplicity do it move forward? Right, it's not like I'm gonna get progressively harder throughout the different quarters of the year, not at all, just steadiness, discipline. What are the actions I need to take in order to accomplish this goal? Plan the workouts and have habits set up. What can I do now to increase my chances of success? Prepare, track and evaluate weekly. And then I also made this list of things that keep me healthy and a list of like little things that I do oil pulling my sauna, collagen tracking my cycle, having healthy and quick snacks. So I literally wrote tons of things that I have access to that just help me stay healthy. For me, it's easier to remember to do my health habits when I'm like not feeling well because I want my health back. It's harder for me to remember to do them when I'm feeling great because I'm like I feel great. But for anyone who's been alive for any length of time, you appreciate your health most when you're sick, and so I wanna make sure I have these things that help keep me healthy happening to help give me longevity, to help give me day to day health and to help support me for those times where I am not physically well All right.
Speaker 1:The final area personal growth. What is my most important goal for next year? For me, it is discipline and promise keeping, which I call personal leadership. Practice and prove to myself that I'll do what I say I'll do. Remember that focus creates freedom. Be the CEO of my own life. Why is achieving this goal important to me? Because everything hinges on this. It hinges on personal leadership. What will success look like? I wrote about that and, on an average day, someone who will achieve this goal schedules and plans and then does it. I made sure to write to include rest in this personal leadership. That rest is okay. Then how will I know if I'm on track achieving this goal For me? If I am on track achieving this goal of personal leadership, this discipline, this promise keeping to myself, then I will be achieving my other goals.
Speaker 1:It was really fun for me to write this down and realize that my personal growth goal literally is the foundation upon which all of my other goals sit. It's not even like I have a fourth goal. I have a foundation and then I have three goals. On this page, I also made a list of things that I love so that I can remember when I just need a break or rest or feel like I'm just grinding and need time to have some fun. These are some things I can go to Crafting, crocheting, embroidery, baking, cooking, watercolor. There's way more than that, but that was my quick list. Action steps what are the actions I will need to take in order to accomplish this goal? I wrote a weekly leadership meeting with myself where I evaluate and plan, where I am leading myself forward in life, where I'm reviewing what's not working and looking at the week ahead. And then this also includes that daily journal that I talked about at the beginning, so that I can look back on the year, how I was feeling and what my focus was.
Speaker 1:I really want to be able to look back on 2024 and know what I struggled with, what were my lows for the day, what were my highlights, what thoughts did I have? What did I do to be present with each of my family members? Did I move my body? Did I get outside? What was the weather like? What was my mood like? Was I in a funk? Was I feeling great? These things are important to me because the only day I'm ever in is today. The only day you are ever in is the exact day you're in right now, and therefore it does not feel excessive to really look back on your day every day and acknowledge the highs and the lows, and the lessons and the connections and the things you did for you.
Speaker 1:Because I know for me, at the end of a lot of days, I feel like I haven't done much. When I actually have to sit down and write it down and focus on it, it helps me see what I've done and it motivates me for the next day. It's almost like the energy boost, the energy drink I need, by reviewing my day before. It's like the caffeine drip for the next day where I'm just like, okay, I did it, I can do this again. Or man, I was so accomplished and I really just want to rest today and do something creative all day. So the daily journal. I'm excited to see how that evolves over the next few weeks and then excited to share that with you as a tool to help you get really present for your day to day life.
Speaker 1:And the last question is what can I do now to increase my chances of success? Schedule it. You see a theme here, right? This is the discipline promise, keeping schedule and plan and then do it. It sounds so simple. We all know it's not necessarily that simple, but it also is that simple. It's both. It's not necessarily easy to make yourself just do the thing, but it is simple. Yeah, you feel that it's not necessarily easy to discipline yourself, but disciplining yourself is actually kind of simple. It's such a simple solution. That doesn't mean it's easy, but then when I'm able to step back and remind myself, this is not over complicated, don't over complicate it. It's very simple Move your body for 30 minutes a day, write for 15 minutes a day, do something fun with your family every day and only scroll for five minutes.
Speaker 1:If you do those four things every day, by the end of the year you will be way on the path to where you want to be. You will have knocked out your four main North Star goals 100% guaranteed, and it feels pretty powerful to know that big things can happen with so much simplicity. All of the other things the daily journaling and the planning and all of that are great. My four main goals. If I just do one thing in each of those a day, which I have listed as 30 minutes of movement, 15 minutes of writing, scroll limit of five minutes and do something with my family that's intentional every day, and with my family it could be one on one or whatever. Whatever it is, if I do those four things, then I'm on the right track. Everything else is just icing on the cake. It's the sprinkles on top. It's the things that would be nice to do but don't have to be done. They're the things that help support those four goals. But if I do those four, at the end of 2024, I'll be so proud of what I did.
Speaker 1:The last page of this annual review is final thoughts. What would have to have happened at the end of next year for me to look back on the year and consider it a success For me? I wrote phone boundaries, intentional family time book, published workout four to five days a week. The next question is who do I need to become for next year's chapter of my life story to turn out the way I would write it? I need to be disciplined and consistent, grounded. See the magic in life. Just do it. Have intentional time. The next question I'm not going to share my answer with you, but I really like this question.
Speaker 1:If I had to accomplish all of my goals for the next decade, for the next 10 years, within the next year, what would I do? We really take this wide timeline and condense it. What would you do? It's interesting because I feel like I'd be able to do a lot of that if I were to really get focused. Now that's kind of for me, not where I'm going to put my focus, but it really helps me feel like this next year can be so expansive. If I can really get simple and focused, not overcomplicate things, really simplify my daily tasks, I could really condense some of my 10 year goals into the next year. Like I said, though, that's not my focus. My focus is those North Star, those main four goals and focuses, and they feel so doable. Right, do you hear that? And it Sounds like my four goals for the year are really doable because they feel really doable to me. I invite you to look at this, the Modern Wisdom annual review. Google that it will show up. This was a really cool tool to use. This has been one of the years where my goals feel really simplified, really pulled back, and, at the same time, with just these four goals, I would accomplish more than I have in most years where I have a lot of goals.
Speaker 1:This next year hasn't been written yet. We don't know what doors will open or what doors will close. We don't even really know what our lives will look like. We trust that tomorrow will look similar to today, but we don't know that we trust that six months from now, life will probably look like this, but we don't know that. There is some energy around the beginning of the year where people can get kind of mad or angry at goal setting. I love it.
Speaker 1:It is winter. It is a time to slow down. It is a time to look inward. That doesn't mean we can't set goals. In fact, I think it's probably one of the best times to set goals, because you're inside, it is you, it is cozy.
Speaker 1:What truly matters to you when you're not out running around with the energy of spring and summer or the release of fall, but you're just home with yourself? What truly matters to you? What are your goals? What simple things can you do this next year to step into the next version of you, to achieve some things that you truly care about, or to create and cultivate a life that fills you up? Then, as you set these goals, you can use the energy of winter moving into spring to start to gain momentum, the time of growth, of planting seeds. You reap what you sow in the fall and then you do it again in the winter.
Speaker 1:The cyclical way of living winter in the northern hemisphere is a perfect time to set goals, to come home to yourself, to sit down, write, process plan and let that help move you forward, because you have taken the time to figure out what you want your destination to be, figure out where you are, figure out what's worked and what hasn't worked, so you stop banging your head against the same wall for the fourth or fifth year in a row, just banging your head against the same wall with the same goals.
Speaker 1:What's not working? What do you need to do to make it work? Take the magic of your own mind to create your reality, to create your plan, to create your goals. Thank you for being here for another episode. Please subscribe if you find this useful, leave a review. If you're on YouTube, leave a comment and let me know what your main goals are, your main focus for 2024. I'm excited for this year on Whatever with Heather to grow this podcast, to share and learn together, to have more guests, to be inspired by each other, and I'll see y'all next week on Whatever with Heather. Bye.